you shattered my fucking heart, and I still want you
written by things I never had #1 - thisporcelainworld
I have this theory that the reason we fall in love with most things, is because we relate it to ideas or past memories.
For instance, I am utterly in love with mixing colors.
Not the actual product of the mixed colors, but of that in-between stage when you can definitely see two distinct colors, however, that they are so immersed in each other that they’re almost one, but they’re not
(kinda like we were).
That in-between stage reminds me of a galaxy, and of all of the extraordinary things we have yet to discover
(and something I’d like to explore is the wholeness of your being).
I’m in love with doodling on myself because actual tattoos mean you have enough conviction to get something practically engraved on your body,
(and you know that commitment has scared me ever since every important person in my life has abandoned me)
and little doodles never hurt anyone
(but they look hella cool),
they reminded me that everything and everybody was temporary, everyone was just a doodle
(although you promised me you were a tattoo).
I’m in love with the wind because I believe it is one of the most powerful forces in nature. And it reminds me that sometimes the most powerful things, are things that cannot be seen
(remember that time the words “I love you” came from your lips and I swore, although those words weren’t tangible, they hit me so hard and I was so taken back, I almost didn’t say it back?).
I’m in love with rainy days because they remind me of every romantic movie that’s ever had their characters do outlandish things when it was pouring outside. And of course the hopeless romantic in me tells me that when everything is right, that could be me one day
(we kissed in the rain that one time it was pouring outside, and we promised never again because truth be told, kissing in the rain is over rated, mostly because we both felt like we were drowning).
And I’m in love with your smile.
Not that little half smirk you do
(although it is sexy as hell)
but that full blown “I’m genuinely happy” smile
(I stopped seeing that smile as soon as I told you that it would be better for us to part ways).
That smile reminds me that everyday is a new day,
and it’s not too late
(I’m sorry for thinking you were just a doodle);
It’s never too late
(maybe commitment could work for us).
So I’m coming back to you, love
(but in my mind, I never left).
written by N.E.W.,  Theories I: Why We Fall In Love
(via lookingforsomeonewhocares)

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